March Madness

Nope. This is not a post about basketball. The title just seemed very apt for my life lately. A lot has been going on, hence the hush that has befallen my blog. Most of it falls in the not-so-good category. If this keeps up, I think I'm going to loose what is left of my mind.

The Not-So-Good:

-Mattias has gone on strike. Nursing strike. Eating strike. Pooping strike. I wonder if he thinks I'm trying to poison him... the problem is, he will not take a bottle. He hasn't figured out the sippy cup. My options are pretty much limited. Today, I used a syringe to feed him because he hadn't had any fluids in about 6 hours.

-He also won't take my pumped milk. I have high amounts of Lipase (an enzyme that breaks down fat) in my milk. About 20 minutes after my milk is pumped, it starts to taste soapy. He refuses to drink it. The only way to get rid of it is to scald the milk right after pumping it. To say it's a beating is a bit of an understatement.

-All this nursing stress (combined with the other stuff) is causing my milk to dry up. I'm doing everything I can to keep it up, but it's not easy. Plus, if my milk does dry up, how on earth will he eat, considering he won't take a bottle or sippy cup?

-Elise's numbers are going crazy. Trying to find a spare moment to sit down and look over her logs is hard.

-Fred is travelling a lot lately. It sucks doing this all by myself.

-No bites on the house yet. Not even a nibble. We've had three showings and it's been really rough getting the house in order and trying to get out of the house while it's being shown. The other day, it was booked for TWO FREAKING HOURS (over lunch time... great). Towards the end, Mattias was so tired and I needed to try and nurse him, that I just went home with 20 minutes to go. Thankfully they weren't there. To top it all off, their critique of the house was, "we don't want a two story". Then why the %*&! are you looking at my house WHICH HAPPENS TO BE A TWO STORY? STOP WASTING MY TIME!!!

-I'm am just one big ball of stress. My jaw is permanently clenched and my shoulders reside somewhere up near my ears. The littlest thing will set me off. Like the guy who ran a stop sign to cut me off and get in front of me in the drive-thru (then proceeded to give me the finger when I honked at him). If not for little eyes, I think I would have jumped from my car, pulled him out by his nasty white wife-beater, yanked said wife-beater up over his face (think hockey fight), and started pummeling him. Never cut in front of a red head.

The Good:

-I finally won something! Heidi was giving away a Daily Devotional book and a Starbucks gift card in honour of Bekah's D anniversary... and I was the lucky winner! Thanks Heidi, I've been meaning to email you to let you know that I had received both items, but my email inbox is another source of stress these days. Now, if Starbucks would only deliver.

-Tomorrow is another day. I just need to keep holding onto the fact that it has to get better... right?

That's all I've got. Sorry for the downer post. Here's hoping that I'll be back to my shiny-happy self soon (or as shiny-happy as I get).