I am Crazy Slowly Going

DBlog week - Day 4
What brings me down- Today let’s revisit a prompt from 2014 - May is Mental Health Month so now seems like a great time to explore the emotional side of living with, or caring for someone with, diabetes. What things can make dealing with diabetes an emotional issue for you and / or your loved one, and how do you cope?

***I'm phoning it in today, and using my post from 2014. With a few changes.***

I often joke that when I gave birth to my kids, most of my brain must of come out too, because I think I've become dumber with each child I've birthed.

Add diabetes to the mix and it's amazing that I remember to dress myself before I walk out the door.  Mentally, I am exhausted.

Over the past five years, diabetes has become increasingly frustrating.  Elise doesn't follow trends.  She requires very little insulin most days her TDD is about 15 units (she usually eats 50-100g per meal).  She goes through periods where we don't bolus her for meals.  Or only bolus by half.  We've never been able to bolus her fully for her dinner.  We do it manually over a period of five hours.  

And then there are the times she's high no matter how much insulin we dump into her.

Mentally, it's exhausting.  It's like an enigma, wrapped in a paradox, stuck inside a conundrum.

Or something.

I don't really have any sage advice on how to deal.  My method is to rant and rage (to my husband, a friend, my blog, or an empty room).

I play soccer.  Like, a lot of soccer.  Some weeks I have 4 games.  Win or lose, soccer makes me smile, and takes me back to my younger days... when I was actually good at something.

I remember all that I'm thankful for; especially that my daughter is here in my arms. It could be so much worse.

And then I go to Target.  Because Target is always good for all that ails you.